For some reason my girlfriend adores those hairless cats. She goes so far as to make me shave our cat. Gay
[By: bald kitty]

I took my girlfriend out to my cousins wedding. When they were doing the flower throwing thing, she caught them. Everyone looked at me and my dad even said “so when you gonna set your date?” I’ve only known the girl for 3 months. Gay
[By: not ready]

My girlfriend dumped me because she says I eat too much pizza and gained too much weight. She was the one who always bought pizza and gained 40lbs since we met. Gay
[By: Wacarnolds]

I spent 3 days at the hospital with my girlfriend. She just had a baby. The baby was white, am black. I was so relieved. Gay
[By: LoneG]

Whenever my girlfriend yells at me I just let her talk and go into my own world of thoughts. She hates it to the point where she’ll start yelling to the top of her lungs. I had to go out the house to make sure people didn’t think I was beating her. Gay
[By: nunk]

My girlfriend has spent the past 8 hours eating ice cream and watching sex in the city instead of hanging out with me. Gay
[By: needsex]

My girlfriend has flawless skin. She makes these nasty smelling aspirin masks that she swears kills off bad stuff from her face. Her face is nice from a distance, but when you want to kiss it, it smells like vinegar and shrimp. Gay.
[by: FB]

My gf told me aluminum was microwavable. Gay.
[by: need a new microwave]

I was talking to my girlfriend one day and I guess I was being annoying because she told me to shut my doughnut hole. Then I said “i’ll shut YOUR doughnut hole… with my penis.” She got really angry. Apparently her parents had been right behind me for some time. Gay
[By: I like holes]

Today I found out that my boyfriend and his friends refer to me as Jabba The Hut. I’ve been crying every night and hiding it from him for the past few weeks. Gay
[By: Cindy]

My girlfriend and I were at the movies, and I got annoyed that she was texting the whole time. So I asked her if she could do that some other time. She got up and broke up with me right in front of a full theater. Gay
[By: Don D]

My boyfriend forgot to pick me up from work again. I started walking home, because it was not too far away but then it started raining. My phone died and I couldn’t call him to pick me up so I had to run home in the rain. Gay
[By: stupid bf]

Today I found out my wife has been pregnant for about 2 months. I’ve been out of the country with the military for about 5 months. Gay
[By: Hoes]

My girlfriend of 4 years just left me because she says we don’t have anything in common anymore. She would rather hang out with her friends than me. Gay
[By: broken]

My guy expects me to work to pay the bills, stay in shape, do all the housework, look good nice 24/7, take care of his dog (which I love more than him) and cook. I’ve been wanting to dump his ass for the longest time, but I don’t want to become separated from his dog. Gay.
[by: Anonymous]

Two weeks after giving birth, my husband tells me I’m getting a little flabby. Gay.
[by: ANGRY WIFE]